Trust your gut


Notes to Self

Comparison really is the thief of joy.

Can we enjoy a meal without critiquing it to every other similar meal we’ve had before it?

Can we find pride and joy in our accomplishments thus far without comparing them to the perhaps greater and flashier milestones our peers have reached?

Can we appreciate that we have what we have instead of constantly wondering how to get what he has, what she has?

Someone will always have more than you–more money, a bigger house, nicer cars, better looks, more impressive credentials, less dysfunctional families, a better personality, better luck. Some of these things are hard earned, while others aren’t. The constant dick measuring contest leaves no one satisfied.



Went in strong and came out humble. No blame to the refs, his team or his opponent, but instead lots of praise and thanks. How To Lose Gracefully 101.


Class Act



Let’s talk about what we should and should not demand from the world around us.

If you park and leave your car on Skid Row long enough, you should expect that shit will get fucked up or stolen.
If you leave your car unlocked somewhere long enough, shit will get fucked up or stolen.
Or at the very least, bums/teenagers may discover your unlocked car and decide to bump uglies in your backseat (at which point I would rather have my car stolen).

Women who dress in skimpy clothing and then complain about being objectified by men… Honey. Do you think the rest of us are dressed modestly because we run colder than you?

Men who flaunt status, wealth, material possessions, you should expect gold diggers to flock.

We should not expect our parents, grandparents, close relatives to owe us financial support after the age of 18. (Not saying it’s wrong, but I don’t think it should not be expected.) Or expecting parents and grandparents to leave you their monetary possessions when they pass. Have you seen siblings fight over their late parents’ property and money when the body is still warm? Have you seen families ripped apart because someone wasn’t included in the will? Where does this entitlement come from?

We should not expect employment if we have a college degree. Nobody ever promised that.

You should not expect your entire social circle to make sacrifices when you have a baby. This was your decision and your blessing–take the help they offer you with appreciation. I will keep my weekends for myself, not having a child allows me this luxury.

We should not expect that bad things shouldn’t happen to you because you’re a good person. Fucked up shit happens MOST to good people, haven’t we universally established this? The drunk driver always lives, his passengers/other vehicles involved do not. The morally bankrupt are usually the wealthiest, and the immigrants with the hearts of gold struggle the hardest.

Expecting immediate forgiveness because you’re sorry. At the very least, give people the space and time to heal, unbothered. And as painful as it is, sometimes you won’t ever get forgiveness no matter how sorry you are.

Lending money to an addict and expecting to see it again.

You should expect your employer to pay you on time. No ifs, ands or buts.

You should expect to feel more happiness than not if you make an effort to practice gratitude and compassion daily.

You should expect your skin to thank you if you drink tons of water and less alcohol/soda, sleep more and not touch your face with dirty fingers.

You should expect better sex when your partner and you have that beautiful, intimate talk (or hopefully an ongoing discussion) about what makes you see little fireworks, what makes his toes curl, what you both fantasize about, and what each person is willing to do and setting respectful (and hopefully gratifying) limits in bed.

You should expect people to respect your boundaries when you begin to say NO.(Currently practicing this, years of wanting to please everyone is hard to undo).

We should expect our nation’s leader to protect the rights of all citizens.